An Ode to Scooter Girl

Scooter girl is probably my favorite person to ever exist. She is beyond fierce and radiates sass in every aspect of her. But in order to fully understand the essence of our friendship, I should probably provide you with some context.

I had an 8 am math class my freshman year of college. I know, 8 am what was I thinking? It was especially awful considering it took me two hours just to get to school (I went to school in Staten Island and yes the stereotypes are true). This meant leaving my house at 6 am, catching two trains and a bus. I also repeatedly made the same mistake of getting coffee when I got off the train, which then resulted in waiting in a bus line that spiraled around the block and standing on a crowded bus for about an hour (and always spilling coffee on myself).

By the time I got to class, I was already exhausted. It also didn’t help that my professor was an old, foreign lady who practically whispered the entire lesson (she also wore socks with sandals). I sat in the second row in between a guy who looked like Justin Bieber and a girl who still looked like she shopped at Limited Too. Did I mention I’m terrible at math? So understandably I hated this class for a variety of reasons. But then everything changed.

One class, I’m sitting there spacing out as usual, desperately waiting for my professor to dismiss us, when the girl in front of me gets up, pulls out a scooter from under her desk, and rides out of class. I watched her in awe– from that point on, I was her number one fan.

Scooter girl became my main incentive for going to class. I even got there early sometimes. She was always there around 7:30 am, eating a giant bag of chocolate Chex Mix; this girl had no shame. She also wore very elaborate hair scrunchies that never failed to amuse me during class.

Observing scooter girl became one of my main hobbies. I know that sounds really creepy but I just think people are really interesting, I guess that’s why I’m majoring in sociology. I eventually started posting about her on Facebook every Wednesday and Friday when we had class together. Before you knew it, scooter girl’s fan base was more than just myself. It’s amazing how many social situations I’ve been in where people have confronted me about my excessive updates on this girl, most people found her just as amusing as I did.

The most pivotal moment in scooter girl’s friendship and mine was one morning when I handed her the roster and she said thanks; this was our first conversation. There was also another time after class when we both got on the same bus. It was surreal. I wanted to take a picture of her but couldn’t do it discretely because I had a Razr (yes, I had a Razr flip phone my first year of college).

So anyway, my friendship with scooter girl is going great until I checked the mail one day. I had received a letter from the bursar’s office notifying me that I was in danger receiving a poor grade in the class and might consider withdrawing without penalty. My heart sunk as I read this. I seriously contemplated dropping the class all night but as much as I wanted to pursue my friendship with scooter girl, I knew it was not worth jeopardizing my grade for.

It deeply pained me when I officially dropped the class. It was also upsetting to find out I didn’t need that math class to start with. Of course, it was nice not waking up at 5 am but I undoubtedly missed being in the presence of scooter girl.

I still think about her to this day. Yeah, she was just a random girl in my math class but she really resonated with me. In some ways, I wish I could be more like her. Scooter girl really didn’t care what others thought about her and I find that extremely admirable. I think we can all learn something from scooter girl: always be true to yourself– even if that means riding a scooter well above the age that it is socially acceptable.


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